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Marshall Davis Brown Jr: Talking to Kids about Divorce

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Talking to Kids about Divorce

Divorce is easy on no one involved, unfortunately, but it's particularly devastating for children to cope with. A lawyer like Marshall Davis Brown can help to sort out the issue of child custody, visitation, and child support, but only the parents can manage the emotional aspect. It's a subject that has to be approached delicately, and there are a few things you can do to make the process as easy to cope with as possible.

Make a Game Plan
Don't let your kids find out the hard way. Think of what you're going to say to them, and keep any information about it private until you talk to them. If possible, sit down with your spouse to decide who is going to say what and give them as much information as they need.

Schedule a Family Conversation
If at all possible, don't have one person break the news. Have everyone sit down together so that the children know neither parent will be out of their lives. Show them that you are still able to communicate, and don't let any bad blood show through in the conversation. Show that you and your spouse still support each other's decisions; it will make the new living situation easier to adapt to.

Be Honest
Let your kids ask any questions they might have, and be honest with them in an age-appropriate manner. Don't make any promises you can't keep in order to appease them – it will only make the situation more shocking for a prolonged period of time. However, while maintaining the mantra that honesty is the best policy, remember to tell the kids why things aren't working out – don't show them. Remain as calm as possible and don't talk down about your spouse; be as objective as possible.

The whole thing will be difficult for kids to absorb, but the more information they have – and less emotional persuasion – the easier it will be for them to understand. Try to maintain as stable a lifestyle as possible for them and make the change seem as minimal as possible.  


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