Divorce is easy on no one involved, unfortunately, but it's particularly
devastating for children to cope with. A lawyer like Marshall
Davis Brown can help to sort out the issue of child custody, visitation, and child
support, but only the parents can manage the emotional aspect. It's a subject
that has to be approached delicately, and there are a few things you can do to
make the process as easy to cope with as possible.
Don't let your kids find out the hard way. Think of what you're going to
say to them, and keep any information about it private until you talk to them.
If possible, sit down with your spouse to decide who is going to say what and
give them as much information as they need.
a Family Conversation
If at all possible, don't have one person break the news. Have everyone
sit down together so that the children know neither parent will be out of their
lives. Show them that you are still able to communicate, and don't let any bad
blood show through in the conversation. Show that you and your spouse still
support each other's decisions; it will make the new living situation easier to
Let your kids ask any questions they might have, and be honest with them
in an age-appropriate manner. Don't make any promises you can't keep in order
to appease them – it will only make the situation more shocking for a prolonged
period of time. However, while maintaining the mantra that honesty is the best
policy, remember to tell the kids why
things aren't working out – don't show them. Remain as calm as possible and
don't talk down about your spouse; be as objective as possible.
The whole thing will be difficult for kids to
absorb, but the more information they have – and less emotional persuasion –
the easier it will be for them to understand. Try to maintain as stable a
lifestyle as possible for them and make the change seem as minimal as possible.